Friday, April 23, 2010
What does it really mean to let God decide everything?
I thought I surrendered
Why am I still so worried about so many things?
I'm worried
Worried about the outcome of my internship
Worried of possibilities of not getting an A
Worried that it the A- internship grade will ruin my life
Worried of it ruining my first class chances
Worried about not getting employed by Petronas
Worried about getting employed by Petronas and not doing something I like
Worried about what to say in my future interview
*which is more than a year away!*
Worried about my life not going as planned
Basically worried about my whole life now
Why?
I thought I surrendered
After the crush in form five
I knew that God knows best
Surrendered
I survived the crush
In fact, I had a great time in UTM
All these perhaps, because have gained
I thought I will be wiser
I thought I can now manage
Much gain, much fear to be lost
I'm starting all over
Mentality of when I was in high school
Planning my whole life ahead
Trying to take control of everything
Things that I have no control over
I walked ahead of God, into path unknown to myself
Tugging at God at times, to follow me instead
*I really AM a boar!*
All I have now is Petronas scholarship
and possibility of being employed by Petronas
Already I'm depressed to the core,
by my own thoughts and pride
How am I to manage all else God plan to give me?
What does it mean to let God decide?
Perhaps I should live today as it is
Let tomorrow be what God's will to be
Let the future unveil itself at God's time
Stop planning, stop leading
Time to turn back and receive His outreach hand
Let Him lead
I love you, Lord.
Irony is that, the post was not supposed to be about this at all. I was about to write about a new friend, who's mid twenty and has the mentality of high school girls. Somehow it quickly brought me down my own memory lane, and realised I have no right to judge her mentality at all. I thought I matured, now I realised how much I have back-slided. Much catching up to do. Thank you,Lord.
I thought I surrendered
Why am I still so worried about so many things?
I'm worried
Worried about the outcome of my internship
Worried of possibilities of not getting an A
Worried that it the A- internship grade will ruin my life
Worried of it ruining my first class chances
Worried about not getting employed by Petronas
Worried about getting employed by Petronas and not doing something I like
Worried about what to say in my future interview
*which is more than a year away!*
Worried about my life not going as planned
Basically worried about my whole life nowWhy?
I thought I surrendered
After the crush in form five
I knew that God knows best
Surrendered
I survived the crush
In fact, I had a great time in UTM
All these perhaps, because have gained
I thought I will be wiser
I thought I can now manage
Much gain, much fear to be lost
I'm starting all over
Mentality of when I was in high school
Planning my whole life ahead
Trying to take control of everything
Things that I have no control over
I walked ahead of God, into path unknown to myself
Tugging at God at times, to follow me instead
*I really AM a boar!*
All I have now is Petronas scholarship
and possibility of being employed by Petronas
Already I'm depressed to the core,
by my own thoughts and pride
How am I to manage all else God plan to give me?
What does it mean to let God decide?
Perhaps I should live today as it is
Let tomorrow be what God's will to be
Let the future unveil itself at God's time
Stop planning, stop leading
Time to turn back and receive His outreach hand
Let Him lead
I love you, Lord.
Irony is that, the post was not supposed to be about this at all. I was about to write about a new friend, who's mid twenty and has the mentality of high school girls. Somehow it quickly brought me down my own memory lane, and realised I have no right to judge her mentality at all. I thought I matured, now I realised how much I have back-slided. Much catching up to do. Thank you,Lord.
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4 oinkss:
After reading ur post..Suddenly feel that...i should worried bout that too but..how come..im not worried?make me more worried..haha...so..stella..加油！！！Let it be...!!!
=.=' so you worry about the fact that you're not worried?? lolsss... humans mmg find alot of things to worry about. time to focus one the joy of simple happiness.. Enjoy our lives ^0^
Philippians 4:6
In nothing be anxious, but in everything, by prayer and petition with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God.
^__^
=) it's not easy to surrender *sigh* seems like i need to remind myself to surrender from time to time, else i will tend to walk ahead again...
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